Monthly Archives: June 2016

Fear of Falling in Love: Addicted to Avoiding Love?


What is philophobia?

This symptom is defined as a trauma whose origin comes from childhood and the family base, where the primordial is the affective. This basically translates into the fear of suffering and being abandoned.

Why are we afraid to fall in love?

Basically we imagine two situations when someone feels that fear of falling in love. The perfect situation would be that we would be reciprocated with the same feelings we experienced towards the other person. The other scene would be in which we are not reciprocated, which makes us decide not to go forward because of the fear of being rejected . This is accompanied by a great feeling of emptiness.

Where does that fear come from?

Perhaps one of the causes of the fear of falling in love is that we have previously idealized the relationship and we think that everything has to happen as we have imagined. In this way we will not feel comfortable if our expectation changes regarding our relationship.

On the other hand, perhaps this fear of commitment appears to be dedicated to a person, especially when he has not had a stable relationship before. Devoting attention to a person when one is accustomed to being single can be a big step at first.

  • There are people who prefer not to carry the relationship to such an extent, so as not to overwhelm to take the step towards the future of a relationship. That way they would avoid that fear of falling in love too much to finally go on to lead a serious relationship.
  • Just as it can happen when you have had a relationship before that caused you to spend bad times and falling in love again reminds you of the same situation.
  • It is true that mistakes are learned, but perhaps it is time to put aside the remorse of past relationships. New person, new relationship. Think that each person is different and like every relationship, from each one you can learn something new. But of course what is mainly sought is happiness, that is why sometimes the fear of not being happy prevents us from moving forward.

Try to clarify your feelings: what do you really feel?

Having clear feelings is what will best help you take this step to end the fear of falling in love. But how do you know if what you feel is true? We may have a bit of uncertainty as to the safety of going forward, but in these cases as the saying goes, whoever does not risk does not win. If you never take that step to try to know your true feelings as well as those of the other person, you will never know with certainty if it is really love.

Think about whether you feel comfortable with yourself, and what you are really looking for in the topic of love, this will make it easier to clarify yourself when you start to find love.

How to overcome the fear of falling in love?

The main thing is to learn to recognize that he is afraid of falling in love. Just try to be aware of whether your feelings are real and try to determine where that fear comes from . By accepting your own fear it will be easier for you to overcome it.

It is no use staying locked in their feelings, after all, somehow they will end up afloat.

Being realistic and optimistic will help you express your feelings. You may be afraid of falling in love, but love eventually becomes a basic need, where the feeling of showing your affection and affection and feeling loved by another person becomes the law of life. Think about what benefits you would have if you launched yourself to find love, if you never try, you will never know.

Encourage yourself to try, taking this step can lead you to happiness. Open up and show your feelings, let yourself go. Just be yourself.